fragile

A very crazy few weeks:  diagnosis, surgery, hospital, recovery at home, parents in town, work, and dance.  I have tried very hard to keep everything together and organized and logistically sound.  I've tried to be emotionally strong for John.  I've tried to be a good daughter while my parents were here at a rather inconvenient time and have fun and keep the scariness of the cancer conversations to a minimum.  I've tried to keep everything at work under control so that my absence wouldn't be felt. I've been my regular bouncy self at dance and students who aren't personal friends have no idea that John has a cancer battle. I've tried to take care of myself in the midst of all of this because I can do none of those things if I am not strong.  My parents left yesterday.  John has been going to work half days this week and while.  My boss told me today that  I am doing a great job.  I don't have any dance choreography on my schedule until after Memorial Day.  I can slow down.  However, every time I have done that today I get tears and I'm not quite ready for that yet.